Even if you are already dealing with your tormentor (the newborn), stress levels are high, and you can’t seem to get a grip on your patience, let me give you some tips for how to build patience when dealing with a baby as a brand new dad!
The transition to fatherhood is a challenging one… especially if you are entering early fatherhood.
One of those challenges is keeping cool during the early days as a new dad once your baby is born. In fact, It’s not just dads… most new parents struggle with patience!
Remember, just because you lose patience every now and again, it doesn’t mean you are not a good dad!
Patience doesn’t come naturally. Losing patience is a natural way of reacting to unpleasant situations.
Like any other skill we learn, you can learn and master patience with practice.
If you feel that you tend to lose your patience at the drop of a hat, let us not waste another moment and get into the strategies right away. Because when you are tired, stressed, and your new baby wants to spend the early hours of the morning staring into your soul, you are gonna need patience!
Let’s take a look…
7 Strategies To Be More Patient As A New Dad
Here are some tips and techniques to help you cultivate patience and gradually make it into a naturally occurring state of mind.
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Also, my dad’s guide to newborns is worth reading at this point.
Identify Your Triggers
Everyone has a trigger that sets off the devil in them.
For some, it could be hunger, lack of alone time, dehydration, need for perfection, etc.
When your baby arrives, they will fill you with love but test your patience. They are born with the ability to frustrate.
Understanding your stimuli helps devise the right strategy to help you find your center and inner peace.
Once you know your anger trigger, you can avoid those triggers. Mine was the whole ‘staring into your soul at 3 in the morning’ because my son didn’t want to go to sleep and cried whenever he was put down.
Get Some Good Sleep – Especially Before Your Baby Is Born!
Getting a good night’s sleep can be a challenge for new dads. But we need rest to keep our bodies and minds, right? Why can’t these newborns understand!
When you have a newborn, sleeping through the night is a luxury.
When a person gets adequate rest, the chances of losing patience and temper are significantly lower.
You and your partner can alternate nighttime responsibility so that both of you get enough sleep. And you can also enjoy shorter naps during the day if you feel tired.
I got a good system going with both of our kids. I would take the last feed and the feed at around 4 in the morning. My wife did the feeds in between. It worked for us… find what works for you.
Deep Breathing
Learn to control your breathing.
If you have anyone in your life who seems to handle stressful situations with ease and patience, check out their breathing patterns. Likely, they breathe deeply from their belly.
Whenever we are under stress, the body tends to breathe fast and take shallow breaths. So the next time you feel you are getting taken over by stress, pause, relax and start breathing deeply and slowly into your belly consciously.
This naturally calms your heart and brain and breaks the rising pressure. You can then respond to the situation from a more relaxed space.
Prioritize And Schedule Your Activities
We are expected to deal with many activities during the day, so it doesn’t hurt to be prepared.
This means to prioritize and schedule your family activities and your personal ones.
This technique will help you move past trivial matters. For instance, if you have to get to a meeting, wake up a little early, take care of all your daddy duties and set off.
When you plan, you make life easy for you and your family. Sometimes your plan might flop, but it’s okay to make changes along the way and be flexible.
Always prioritize! Sure, as new dads, they will frequently change, but go with it, and patience will follow.
Set An Alone Time
Having a baby is overwhelming than what most dads expect.
You cannot attend to the needs of your little one stress-free if your battery is dead. It’s a common reason why a new dad will lose patience.
Set time for yourself to enjoy doing whatever makes you feel energized, happy and calm. Some common energizing activities include listening to music, going out for a walk or run, sitting in nature, meditating, watching a movie, etc.
Find out what fills your cup, and you are all good to take care of your baby.
Be Easy On Yourself – A Must For New Dads
Don’t set unrealistic expectations on yourself, and don’t try to do it all.
Take parenthood easy and one step at a time. We lose it when we try to do everything together, control situations, and aim for perfection.
Sometimes you will be on the receiving end of several unexpected behaviors.
Learn to relax and let go because sometimes you cannot do anything other than to be there as a witness.
Always Choose Love
Let’s go back to the situation I mentioned briefly above. My son liked to spend the early hours of the morning just staring at me. I wanted to sleep… and nothing I did would make him close his eyes and fall asleep. This would lead to anger… and I would place him back in the crib, take a walk about the house, and then come back to him to try again.
My anger would be gone.
Then I remembered… he hasn’t been here long, and this is all new to him. Suddenly, love would engulf me. From that moment on, I found it difficult to get angry.
Babies might not be able to understand your language, but they can feel your energy. So you need to make sure that you and your partner radiate love and positivity. Little ones need emotional nourishment as much as they need food.
If you want to raise an emotionally stable, confident, and secure child, you need to create the right kind of atmosphere at home.
Love yourself, your partner, and your child wholeheartedly.
Conclusion
As a final word, don’t try too hard; relax and respond. Build emotional resilience and build a deep bond with your partner and new baby.
Some people have a ton of patience, and some have none. I know that patience can be developed, even when you are a new dad with a new baby!
Practice your breathing, relax when you can, and make sure you and mom are charging your batteries when possible.
Good luck!