Should I have a third baby? Is it really a good idea?
If you have been contemplating how life would look like with another baby in the picture and your house, this article is for you. Is three a magic number when it comes to having kids?
We’ll find out.
For a lot of couples having two children seems manageable and pragmatic. That doesn’t mean others don’t yearn for more, given their circumstances.
You should go through thoughtful consideration and discussion with your spouse before you choose to have a third baby or not.
Every household is different, and while it might not be ideal for some, yours might have a blast having a third kid on the way.
I’ll first take you through the pros and cons of welcoming a third child. Then I’ll help you with deciding whether to have a third child or not.
After all, the choice is yours. I’m here to make that decision more informed.
Pros and Cons of Having a Third Baby
Pros
When you look at the bigger picture of a happy family of five rather than the physical and mental exhaustion that comes with childbirth and motherhood, it might feel no less than a blessing. Because-
- You get to experience and cherish all the stages that flew by so fast with your older kids all over again.
- Your kids will always have a playmate they love, and they’ll take care of each other.
- You don’t have to deal with having an ’empty nest’ so soon
- You’re never out of clothes since they fit into each other’s
- You’ve got two little helpers in the family to take care of the newborn
- You’re more experienced in parenting now and won’t freak out as quickly
Cons
The euphoria sure won’t last forever. So, let’s look at the challenges you might face.
- Additional expenses might mean working extra hours
- More stressful schedule with little to no time for self-care
- Added responsibilities and sleep-deprivation
- Worries about another kid’s college savings fund
- If your house isn’t big enough for three children, looking for a bigger one will add to the worry for you to save more for a down payment.
- If you’re all engrossed in childcare and have no time to spend with your spouse, your marriage might hit a snag.
Is Having a 3rd Baby Easier?
YES. You’ve already taken care of two kids, and they’ve turned out just fine even though you felt like another child would break you during your first pregnancy.
So, parenting a third child might feel like second nature. You’re not the newbie that you were before. You’ve already established a routine for the older ones so that the third one can fall right into it.
In most cases, by the time the third baby comes, the first two are old enough to be more independent, and they sleep through the nights, giving you enough time to cater to the newborn’s needs.
What felt like an eternity during your firstborn seems to pass in the blink of an eye.
Before you know it, they are past the toddler phase, knowing that makes you appreciate each stage more.
Having said that, I’d also have to warn you that every child comes with its own unique challenges.
What worked like a charm with your first and second children might not work for the new one.
Caring for your other two children during pregnancy and postpartum days might be challenging. However, the heart wants what it wants.
If you’re confident that you’re really going to do this and plan accordingly, things tend to work out for the best.
Is Having a 3rd Child a Good Idea?
People around you will tell you many different things, and while that’ll help you see their perspective, it’ll leave you more doubtful as well.
There’s no simple yes or no answer to this question.
To determine if having a 3rd child will be a good idea for you, let’s look at a few things. Then blend those answers with your gut feelings to make the right call.
Has it Always Been a Dream?
Have you always imagined yours as a family of five? Does that fill your heart with love and joy?
If you think you’re financially, physically, and mentally prepared for bringing a new life into your life and home, why not?
But read on and see if you’re truly prepared for what you’re stepping into.
You Don’t Mind the Extra work?
Do you really have the time and stamina for all the hard work? You’ll have to go back to the diaper phase while taking care of two other children.
They say one is like one, but two is like twenty. You do the math for three.
Do you have family or friends nearby who’ll be available to help when your work quadruples and you still have got two hands and days still got only 24 hours?
Did You Evaluate Your Financial Situation?
Are you financially stable to raise three kids? If you’re the mom, you might have to quit your job. Are you ready to be a stay-at-home mom?
Do you think you could manage to be a single-income family without compromising the current standard of living?
How does your partner feel about being the sole breadwinner? What sort of government assistance, child care benefit, or family tax benefit can you expect?
If you’re going down the road, you’d want to have answers to these questions before welcoming a new member to the family.
Is Your Spouse On Board?
Is it something both you and your husband/wife want? Not everyone grows up around siblings and can handle the chaos three kids naturally create.
You’ll certainly need your spouse’s help in raising them.
Working as a team is the way to find sanity in all these. So, if you’re not on the same page, it’ll get complicated.
Can Your Body Handle it?
Is your body capable of dealing with another pregnancy and labor?
Research shows that advanced maternal age can be complex, and as a mom, you might need frequent intervention during pregnancy and childbirth.
Hence, before getting pregnant, it’s a good idea to go through a preconception checkup so that you can take necessary precautions should you need to.
Do You Have Room for One More?
Can your current lifestyle, house, and car accommodate another baby? If not, are you willing and able to make the necessary adjustments?
You have to set your priorities straight. Do you want to have a successful career, or does family come first?
Will you be okay with giving up your career if it comes to that?
Your baby will grow up pretty fast, and you’ll need to have a bigger house and car.
When Should I Have My 3rd Child?
If you’ve thought about everything and decided to have that baby, you might be asking yourself this very question now.
I’ve got you covered.
According to experts, you should have at least 18 months gap between pregnancies to counteract the risk factors associated with low birth weight and preterm birth.
World Health Organization recommends having a break of at least 24 months so that the mother’s body can fully recuperate from the previous pregnancy.
Conclusion
If you are one of those who love children too much and believe that you can never have too many of them, you probably feel that three kids will complete your family.
If that’s the case, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
As long as both you and your spouse have thought it through, go into it with your eyes open.
You got this.
Good luck!
