Toddler Prefers Dad Over Mom? 8 Rules To Fix This Now

Toddlers love playing, but sometimes life’s chores get in the way.

Your toddler doesn’t understand that. I have lost count of the number of times I have explained to my son that:

‘Yes, I have to work, or we can’t afford to pay the bills’ or;

‘I can’t play right now, if I don’t do this laundry then you will have nothing to wear’

Life is easy for a toddler. They do not understand the importance of menial daily chores, which have to be done. They only want to play and eat!

A toddler may prefer dad over mom because of how they are treated. It is time to consider whether or not you shout too much.

I understand that it is not easy to stop shouting at your toddler; they do their best to poke at you until you bite!

Toddlers also enjoy a challenge. If they see you as a pushover, they may not need to communicate with you too much.

Usually, it is only when they want something because they know mom will give it to them.

Your toddler’s brain is at the development stage, where it is optimal for learning.

Not only should you be taking advantage to improve their development, but you should also feed their hunger to learn.

If your toddler views dad as a source of all knowledge, they will go to him a lot more to feed their thirst for knowledge.

There are 2 ways a toddler will react to a parent who does not give them the required attention.

1. Become needy and pay too much attention
2. Withdraw and seek attention elsewhere, usually in the form of another parent. In this case, dad.

I was sitting in a coffee shop with a Flat White a few days ago. Sometimes, I like to sit and people-watch.

As I looked around the room, I noticed a few families that looked pretty stressed!

One parent had their nose deeply implanted in their smartphone, completely ignoring their child, who was desperate for attention.

Another parent (a different family) was doing something much worse. Constantly interrupting their toddler as they were attempting to speak.

How would it make you feel if you were constantly interrupted?

If it were me, I would avoid communicating with that person. If I were a toddler and mom constantly interrupted me, I would prefer dad over mom!

This is number one on the list of things you can do if your toddler prefers dad over mom!

Toddlers, 100%, love to play. All of the time! If you are fun, then they will want to play with YOU.

I know it is a challenge because a grown-up brain is much less imaginative than a toddler’s brain, but you must give it a try!

Toddlers need to learn. 90% of a child’s brain is developed before they reach 5. Take advantage.

Your toddler will have a tremendous thirst for knowledge, and it is your job to quench the thirst.

By becoming a teacher, and a font of knowledge to your toddler, they will respond with respect and admiration.

Pay attention to your toddler. If you notice them playing, coloring, or drawing on their own, go over and ask what they are up to.

Be interested in what your toddler is doing, and they will feel much better about life! Get your toddler to interact with you.

As a parent, it is essential that you do not allow your child to get what they want all the time.

I know it is much easier to shut them up by saying yes all the time, but it is not doing you any favors in the longer term!

You know this.

Stand firm when your child constantly demands things, and they will respect you.

The more you shout at a toddler, the less they will listen.

I know it isn’t easy. Toddlers push and push until they get a reaction from you!

However, when all you do is shout, it becomes normal behavior, and shouting loses its power.

Not only will you lose the ability to get a preferred reaction from shouting (i.e., they listen), but your toddler will copy what you do and shout back.

It is a learned behavior.

It would help if you empowered your toddler to think they have interesting things to say. The only way you can do this is by allowing them to speak.

Do not interrupt what they are saying. Interrupting a toddler will lead to frustration and behavioral issues.

When a toddler is frustrated, it may lead to biting, amongst other things!

If your toddler prefers dad over mom, it is worth considering whether or not mom allows them to speak.

When mom says no, dad always says yes; your toddler will prefer dad over mom. It is natural.

There is another option, though. What if your toddler prefers dad because he explains why the answer is no?

It is fine to say no because you have to stand firm to create respect for your toddler; however, if you say no and offer a reason, your toddler will respect you more.

Not only that, but it will also teach your toddler to reason, which is a vital life skill.

Please don’t take this the wrong way; I am not assuming you are not loving!

Sometimes, when a toddler prefers dad over mom, it may lead to mom withdrawing. Because it hurts, right?

Well, suck it up!

Mom, you must continue offering love and affection, even when your love is spurned! It is tough, but the more you withdraw, the wider the rift is between mom and toddler.

When your toddler prefers dad over mom, dad must offer support to improve the situation.

It is in dad’s best interests that your toddler has equal respect for both parents. Sure, it is a confidence booster for dad, but it is far from ideal. Dad, you risk burnout if you are the go-to parent. Support mom, and share the load!

You both must sit down and discuss how you will approach this behavioral change. Consider the tips above.

Whichever route you are going to take to improve this situation, always stand together and work as a team.

If you see your toddler playing well with mom, dad does something else in a different room. You will be a distraction while mom heals the rift with your toddler.